The Birth Story of Clara Grace

Well, here it is. The story I've been meaning to type up for, oh, two and a half years.

I'm super good at procrastinating hardcore.

But since I'm due in just a few months with baby girl number two, I thought maybe I oughta make this a priority and get it out of my head, before my second delivery fills it up!

My memory isn't great, so the details are fuzzy, but here we go...the story of the birth of Clara Grace Stoddard as told by me. The mom.

PS...there is talk of bodily fluids and such, so if that grosses you out, maybe skip this one.

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• Saturday, August 15, 2015 - Rexburg, Idaho •

I love summers in Rexburg. It doesn't typically get too hot, which is great, since I was really enjoying going on nice long walks every day toward the end of this pregnancy.

Today was the last day of the Madison County Fair & Rodeo, and since admission was free, we finally decided to go check it out. Although I was pretty miserable (since my due date was in two days, I was feeling huge and achy), I let Austin talk me into going over. We lived right across the street from the fairgrounds, so it only took a few seconds to get there, and I knew that once I was done, we could be back home in a jiffy.

So we went, walked around the tiny fair (there really wasn't much to see, except the different food booths), and went over to the rodeo arena to see what was going on. They were having lawn mower races, which was hilarious and made us both oh so proud to be Idahoans.

But after that short little jaunt, my feet were already aching, so we decided we had seen enough and went back home.

As we were walking up the stairs to our second story apartment, I felt *something* in my lady area, and hurried to the bathroom. Turns out that little trip to the fair had helped me lose my mucus plug! So that was kind of exciting, although I didn't expect it to mean much for my progression into labor.

We went about our night as per usual, and went to bed a little after 11:00. After a bit, I was just barely starting to settle in and feel like maybe I could drift off, and according to Austin's FitBit he had been asleep for 8 minutes, when I suddenly felt a *pop* down low, and a gush of fluids. I gasped. There was no question, my water had just broken!

I shook Austin awake, and told him "Babe, my water just broke!". He wasn't quite awake, and said, "Yeah it did...". So I shook him again and said, "Austin, I'm in labor!". Yeah, that got him up and moving! We both were kind of in shock for a minute, and I just kept laughing...which I quickly found out is a good way to keep pushing that amniotic fluid out. So I told him to hurry and grab me a towel so I could waddle to the bathroom without leaking everywhere (did I mention there would be talk of bodily fluids?).

As I made my way to the bathroom, and sat on the toilet, I started instructing Austin to grab all the things we needed to take with us. He was full on energized at this point, and ran around that tiny apartment like a wild man. I cleaned myself up, put on the clean pair of garments he had brought me, and stood up to go get dressed. But then more fluid came out and soaked my underwear again! So I sat back down, and asked Austin to bring me yet another pair of clean underwear. And as I sat there, I suddenly remembered that once your water breaks, you just keep leaking and leaking and leaking. Glad it only took a few pairs of soaked underwear to remember that one. So I grabbed a heavy duty pad, slapped that on, and got dressed.

We had everything ready to go, looked at each other, and tried to think if we were forgetting anything. Then one of us (I don't remember who) remembered that I should get a blessing before we left. We instantly calmed down, I sat on the couch, and my dear husband gave me a sweet blessing. I don't remember anything specific from that blessing...but what I do remember is experiencing some super mild back labor, and just feeling peace and excitement to meet the sweet baby girl who was ready to join us.

• Sunday, August 16, 2015 •

We head out to the car, and made the two minute drive to the hospital. I actually loved going into labor that late at night. There was next to no one outside, it was dark, the roads were clear. and we felt like the only people that existed.

We pulled into the hospital parking lot (I still wasn't having many contractions...they were really mild at this point), walked inside, and rode the elevator into the L&D unit. We had preregistered, so we checked in at the desk, and they ushered us into a room to check my vitals, and to make sure my water had actually broken (and that I hadn't just peed myself).

Waiting to make sure I was actually in labor

If I remember right, I believe it was while we were waiting to get checked out that I started shaking. I do that every once in a while when my nerves are high. So we waited for what felt like forever (it was probably five minutes) for the nurse to come in, and she checked me (and my fluids), and confirmed that I was indeed in labor! So exciting!! One of my biggest fears with this pregnancy was that I wouldn't be able to tell if I was in labor or not. So having it happen this clearly was a relief!



We got moved over into our own room, and I got all set up with my belly monitor and (after a few tries) my IV. They ended up having to put it in my hand (ouch), but at least they finally got it in! It took somewhere around 3-4 tries. Darn my tiny, rolly veins.

At this point, it was about 12:30 AM, and I was still only measuring at about a 3 or 4. So we knew it might be a while, and we turned off the lights and tried to get some rest. Austin started snoring almost immediately, but I struggled to fall asleep. Did you know it's not super comfortable to leak amniotic fluid, have a monitor strapped to your large belly, and an IV in your hand? So I tried to get comfortable for a little while, and slowly drifted off.

Then about an hour or so later, I was woken up by a nurse coming in to give me Pitocin because my contractions had completely stopped. But since my water had already broken, we needed to encourage my labor to progress. I didn't get much sleep after that. I couldn't get comfortable, and my contractions started to get more intense. They certainly were not enjoyable, but I don't remember them being too unbearable. At one point, they offered me a pain medication to help take off the edge, which I quickly accepted. It ended up making me sooooo dizzy though....I did not enjoy that medication. I really need to remember what it was called so I make sure not to get it next time!

Morning eventually came, and I was slowly making progress. Pretty slowly. Then somewhere around 8 or 9 AM, my nurse came in and told me that the anesthesiologist (can we celebrate that I spelled that right the first try?) was going into a surgery soon, and it would be at least another couple of hours before he would be available to give me my epidural (which I was completely on board for). I thought about it for a minute (with not much help from Austin, who was still slightly asleep), and decided I would rather get the epidural sooner than later, so they had him come in and get me all set up.

I had been kind of nervous for the epidural, but the anesthesiologist was SO good, and had such a fun personality, it was totally not a big deal. And Austin absolutely loved watching him do everything, and was asking him all sorts of questions, which helped me feel more at ease and less on the spot. It was perfect. So he got it in, and told me he wasn't going to turn it up to full strength, but that I could later on if I felt like I needed it, which I really appreciated.

So we relaxed once more while I waited to see what an epidural felt like. Turns out, it felt great! I loved it! It didn't completely numb me, so I was still able to move my legs, and feel when I was having a contraction, etc. But best of all, I was just numb enough that I couldn't feel the amniotic fluid I was just sitting in! Honestly, that was probably the worst part of my early labor....so gross and uncomfortable. And yes, I feel blessed that that was the worst part.

The day sort of dragged on after that. Slowwwwwwwly progressing. So we watched TV...I did my (minimal) hair and makeup...I played around on my phone...I ate loooooots of flavored ice chips (those were so yummy!). I also loved my nurses, and they loved that I had a good attitude and a sense of humor. How do I know this? Because at one point, they came in and asked if they could ask me a question. Apparently my doctor has quite the record of splattering blood everywhere when he delivers, so they asked if I would be okay with them hanging up targets around the room. I thought it was hilarious, so they printed off a ton and put them all over. My doctor thought they were pretty clever when he saw them.

Then finally, around 3:15, I was finally at a 10! It was time to push!! As my nurse got things ready for me to push (did I mention how much I loved my nurse??), Austin sent a quick text to our families to let them know it was time! After having an active pregnancy, we didn't think it would take too long to get this girl out.

After pushing for maybe half an hour, they could see her head! She was right there! So I kept pushing....and pushing.....and pushing....for over two hours. For the first hour, I was still in pretty good spirits, felt endorphins running through me, felt strong. Then I started to get tired. I was still able to keep a pretty good attitude, I think, but man it was a little discouraging. It wasn't until about the two hour mark that my doctor could tell that she was "sunny side up". I had never heard that term before, and had never really learned about ideal birthing positions for the baby to be in. I knew breech was no good, but that was it.

Turns out having a face up baby makes it a LOT harder to get them out. And after having her down in the birth canal for so long with little progress, my doctor finally decided to give me an episiotomy. As exhausting as it was to push for so long, I'm thankful he only used that as a last resort. But as soon as that cut was made, she basically came right out! At 5:30 PM, our sweet lil' spud was finally here! Austin cut her cord, and she was quickly placed on my chest. And indeed, a little spud is exactly what she looked like. But the cutest little potato ever! I could hardly believe it! I think I was actually in slight shock. I didn't even know how to respond.

I was holding her, trying to figure out how to react to this tiny little human I had carried for so long, and my doctor delivered my placenta. THAT felt weird and unexpected! I knew it was going to happen, but I felt like....well, like I had lost an entire organ. Weird.

Then I had to get all stitched up. That was also highly unpleasant, as my epidural was slowly starting to wear off, and I could feel a lot of pressure from it. They kept asking me if I wanted them to take my baby and start getting her cleaned up, but I told them no for a while...I needed to snuggle my newborn to distract me from what was happening in my downstairs. And it took a lot longer than I expected, too. I swear it took him 20 minutes to finish up. Once he was finally done, I asked him how many stitches I got (because I've usually heard of women getting 2-3, maybe 5 stitches), and he kind of laughed and said, "Oh, a lot....". So I asked how many a lot was, and he said "Oh, about 25 or so". Oh man....thaaaaat caught me off guard!

So I finally let Austin take this baby girl of ours to get her cleaned up, and since my epidural was about gone, they gave me more of that medicine I got that morning (the stuff I can't remember the name of). And by this point, I hadn't really slept for a loooooong time, and was so dizzy from the medicine they gave me, I could hardly keep my eyes open to watch my baby get cleaned up. Everything was so foggy. I do remember hearing the nurse and Austin say something about me being so tired.

Then, I think it was somewhere around 7 or 8 o'clock at this point, they decided it was time to move us over to the mother/baby unit. So they gathered up all of our stuff to put on a cart for Austin to push over, and got a wheelchair for me. Moving very slowly, they helped me move my legs off the bed, and told me we would just stand up once, sit back down, then stand and move to the wheelchair. Well, as the nurse helped me stand up, the dizziness was intense, and I think I mumbled something about not feeling so good, and then next thing I knew, I was staring at the ceiling. I had passed out (onto the bed, luckily), and Austin said that I sort of jerked around for a minute. Totally freaked him out. Everything was okay, but man I do not respond well to that medication. If anyone has any idea what that stuff was called, let me know, mkay?

So anyway, we finally got me over to the wheelchair, and I was still feeling super dizzy and not okay. Plus, after all those stitches, sitting was NOT enjoyable. But then they hand me my baby to hold on the ride over to the mother/baby unit. I was terrified that entire two minute ride. All I could do was focus on not dropping this sweet little girl, and try not to cry from pain. I was so relieved to get back into a bed, and have my baby in her secure little bassinet.

They asked us if we wanted her to go to the nursery for the night, and I couldn't even hardly function, so we said yes. They also asked if we wanted the to give her formula for the night so I could just sleep, and I said yes. In hindsight, I wish I hadn't done that, so I could get more practice breastfeeding, and avoid potential issues with formula (since we were planning on exclusively breastfeeding anyway), but it wasn't something I had thought about previously, and I was so foggy that all I could think of was sleep.

So we slept that night, only being woken when they came in to give me my medicine. The next day, when they helped me get up to use the restroom, it looked like a murder scene. Yes, I was wearing the awesome mesh panties and ice pack diaper, but I was bleeding out something fierce. I didn't end up needing any transfusions, but they wanted us to stay an extra night just in case. So we did, and I was very grateful for that.

I loved the jacuzzi they had!

In that time, we got a lot of practice breastfeeding. The nurses told me to do the "football hold", which I learned I really didn't like. But it wasn't until we got home that I learned this little girl didn't like it either. Once we got home, and I held her in the more common "cradle" way, nursing was pretty smooth sailing for 19 whole months. She was slightly jaundiced, which made it difficult to keep her awake enough to eat, but not enough for her to need any treatment.

The night she was born, Austin asked me what I thought we should name her. At this point, we were pretty much deciding between two names...I thought I knew what her name was, but didn't want to decide anything until we all got some rest, which I told him. So the next morning, when he brought it up again, I said, "I think her name is Clara Grace". To which he quickly agreed. Which surprised me a little, since the other name we had considered had been his favorite for most of the pregnancy. But we officially decided on her name, and felt really good about it.

So we announced her to the world, and started the next journey: parenthood. And it has been quite the adventure. And I am oh so grateful to get to experience it with this sweet family of mine!

The next part, recovery from childbirth, was easily the worst part for me. But I won't go into that here. Instead, here is one of my very favorite, sweet pictures from that day!

She's been a daddy's girl since she was in the womb, no question

quirk [kwurk]

I found a few saved draft posts that I never published....I thought they were kind of entertaining, so I thought I'd share them! This one was back from my college days. Enjoy!

{8 • 2 • 2011}

: a peculiarity of action, behavior, or personality

everyone has their quirks.

i've been noticing my own more and more.

and other people's, too.

but that's to be discussed another day.

today, it's going to be about me :)

- quirk #1 -

i like to read.

a lot.

i know that's not really that odd.

the odd[ish] part is that i read even when i'm eating.

or when i'm brushing my teeth.

usually my roommates make fun of me.

mostly because when i eat during breakfast...

i hold the book open with my big toe.

obviously my hands are busy with my bowl of cereal.

i've got to keep it open somehow!

i think i was reading harry potter...

- quirk #2 -

i also really like to sing.

a lot.

sometimes it's excessive.

and dramatic.

and yes.....annoying.

but purposefully.

- quirk #3 -

i am really good at spelling.

my friends and acquaintances call me a human dictionary.

not because i know all the definitions.

but just because i can spell them.

a lot of the time i can do it even if i don't know the word.

it just makes sense.

except the word "exercise".

i always have a hard time with that one.

- quirk #4 -

i do a really weird thing in the mornings.

allow me to preface it.

i really hate being late.

i really hate being rushed.

but i also really love to sleep.

so...i wake up a fair amount before i have to leave.

then i get ready really quickly.

then i go back to bed.

until the very last second.

because, you see, then i don't have to worry about rushing.

and i get as much sleep as possible.

weird?

yes.

will i continue?

no doubt.

So It's Been A While...

Oh hey there!

Long time no see! Er...talk....um...type?

Does anyone even remember this movie?
One of the best ones out there.

Obviously getting married made me slightly forget to update my blog.

Which is slightly ironic...considering I always thought it was newly married women who typically started blogs.

Ah well...my life is one big ironic show sometimes. I'm cool with that.

Anyhow, recently I've been trying to figure out what I can do to bring me closer to being "me".

Becoming a wife and then a mother has slightly altered my sense of identity.

I love being both of those things, but sometimes I miss the me I used to be.

And then I remembered that I used to really love blogging!

Just to get my thoughts out...random stories...life tidbits. Etc.

So, I'm just here to say......"I'm BAAAAAAAACK!"

Rain

I love the rain.
I love cuddling up and watching the rain fall from the safety of my home.
I love the smell of rain.
I love the cleansing nature of rain.
I love the sound of rain.

What I hate about the rain?
Driving in it.
It never used to bother me.
Until I about died last week.
Maybe I'm just being dramatic...
(It's probable...)
But I was on my way to work at about 4:20 in the AM...and the road decided to be flooded in such a manner that I couldn't tell it was flooded.
Stupid road.
So as I was speeding up on the on-ramp, I thought nothing of it.
Until I crossed the road construction down onto the old road...and hydroplaned something fierce.
I was 100% certain I was going to crash.
There was no doubt in my mind I was about to run off the road.
Through divine intervention (thank heavens for morning family prayer...), I didn't.

So once I regained control I obviously started bawling.
And decided I no longer like driving in the rain.
At all.
Even if it's drizzling.
I sure hope I get over it...
Because there is a lot of commuting to Idaho Falls in my future.
And winter will be here sooner than I'd like.
And you know what I dislike even more than driving in the rain?
Driving in the snow and ice.

Perks of Being a Registrar: Part III

I've been trying to get myself to get back in the habit of blogging on a regular basis, but I've been super overwhelmed trying to figure out where to begin. So I looked at my drafts folder, and found that I had one more post about my job as a registrar at St. Marks! So here's this post to try to hold you over until I figure out where the heck to go from here.....I'm open to advice.

Ladies and Gentlemen....the Perks of Being a Registrar: The Final Chapter

- There's always the "class clown" who talks to everyone in the waiting room. Sometimes they're legitimately entertaining and awesome. And sometimes they're just obnoxious and exhausting.

- Those people that ask "who?" every time someone's name is called. Even if it's very clearly not their name. Even when they know who is going to be calling their name.

- Patients who walk into my desk space like it's no big deal. I can't tell you how many times I've had to say "Can I have you just step out from behind the desk? Patient privacy, you know..."

- When techs get feisty with rude patients. There was a lady here for some x-rays who was obviously in a big hurry. She kept asking me how much longer the wait would be, etc. Then after she had them done, she had to stay and wait for the films to be printed to take to her doctor. Of course she asked me to call them and tell them to hurry...so I did. Then after the tech brought them out, the lady just took them and started to leave, and the tech just said to her, "Yeah, you're welcome!" Haha.

- I just helped a gentlemen who was very very tall and quite large, and talked like he was in the mafia. It was kind of terrifying.

- Sometimes when I call a department, and tell them "Hey, it's Megan", they think I'm saying "Hey, it's me again".

- When they do the New Employee Orientation, they take them on a tour of the hospital, and they always stop in front of my doors and show them that this is the waiting area for outpatient labs and procedures. I always feel like I'm on display at a zoo. Slightly awkward.

- Quite often, a tech will come get a patient, and they'll say their name once, fairly quietly, while standing at my desk. And then when no one responds they look at me like, "Well, what did you do with this patient?" Um. Maybe try calling their name loud enough for the entire room to hear...

- I always get patients asking me if I have scissors to cut off their wristbands. It's against policy for me to cut them off, so I just tell them I don't have any scissors. Usually they're fine with it, but one lady just responded with "Seriously?" and looked at me like I said I don't shave my legs. Seriously lady. Go get your own dang scissors.

- A patient had to leave for her doctor's appointment, which was in the building. So she opted to go to that really quickly and then come back. I called the department to let them know the patient was leaving, but I would call them when she returned. They called me 3 times and came out to make sure the patient hadn't returned yet. Listen people, if I say I'm going to call when they get back, I will call you when they get back! Have a little faith in the simple lady at the desk.

- When a patient stands at my desk to fill out their paperwork. Yes...I gave you a clipboard to have you hover in front of me for 10 minutes.

- When a patient checks in with me for blood work, I tell them to check in at the window next to me, because that's where the lab is. I have absolutely nothing to do with the lab. Half the time, after I tell them to check in at the lab, the patient will ask me questions like "What's the wait time right now?" or, "How long does the blood test take?". Did I not mention I have nothing to do with the lab? It kills me.

- (After waiting for about 10 minutes) "So if I'm just getting a procedure done, I'm just supposed to wait?" "Yes, they know you're here and will get to you as soon as they can." "Oh, so you guys know what you're doing?" ........okay.

- Two patients are sitting next to each other, and clearly don't know each other. The one comes up to me and whispers "The lady I'm sitting next to is freezing...is there any way you could get a blanket or something for her?" This instance has happened on a few different occasions. It always warms my heart to see a stranger caring for another stranger.

- Sometimes grown men use the word "potty". As in "Excuse me, but is there a potty close by?"

- When patients expect you to fix everything. One lady asked if we had more than one bathroom around here (the one by my waiting room is a single-seater), and I told her that no, the next nearest ones were up by main registration. So she just looked at me and said, "You really should get another one in here. Both me and my husband need to use the restroom, and there's someone in there." And she just looked at me expectantly, like "So, can you get one in here right now?" Sorry...I guess you're going to have to either take a walk to the next nearest loo, or practice some self-control on your bladder.

- Sometimes patients will come down and tell me what they're having done, but they appear empty handed (they're given a sheet of stickers with their name and information at registration). So I'll ask them if they were registered and given stickers, and they will then proceed to pull the folded, beat up sheet from a pocket, purse, etc. What do they think they were given the stickers for? To play with?

This job gave me some good stories. And I worked with some awesome people. But I'm so incredibly happy with the direction my life has taken...even if it means it took me away from Salt Lake :)

Is this real life?

But really though.

I'm really asking.

Because this all seems to good to be true.

Did I really meet the man of my dreams?

And totally fall in love with him?

And he actually loves me back?

So much so that he asked me to be his for FOREVER?!

So far, all signs point to yes!

I haven't woken up from this wonderful dream like I keep expecting to!

I'm starting to get bruises from pinching myself so much.

Oh, and if you want to know more about our lovely love story, I've already typed it up here.

I don't think I could be any more excited for January :)

Sick

Normally, I really love my work schedule.
I only work three days a week, twelve hour shifts.
It's quite fantastic.
I love only working three days a week.
It is slightly exhausting....
But it gives me much more play time.
And time to spend with Austin.
However...
Today I hate it.
Twelve hours is far too long when you're sick.
And yet, not sick enough to call in sick.
I mean, I don't know...maybe some people would.
I've always had a hard time justifying calling in sick.
I think I've called in sick a total of 2 or 3 times in my life.

Mostly because I just don't get sick.
But today I feel kind of awful.
I just want to go home.
Okay.
I'm done whining now.
You may carry on about your day.
However, should any of you feel the urge to bring me some soup or a good fuzzy blanket...I encourage you to give in to that urge.