Do you ever feel like this?
Because I definitely have.
In fact, I feel like that quite frequently.
But lately, I've been feeling a change coming.
I have no idea what that change is.
None whatsoever.
I also don't know what I need to be doing.
After all, I want to make sure it's a good change.
Because change is something I've been slightly terrified of.
And at the same time, it's something I've been intensely craving.
I've been stewing over this whole thing in my mind for awhile now.
And then I had a kind of cool experience.
Allow me to share.
I was at a rehearsal one night (shocking...), and we got done around 7:30.
I took my time getting my stuff together to leave, and next thing I knew, I was alone.
Completely alone.
In the Kirkham auditorium.
That's very rare.
There are always people in the Kirkham...especially in the auditorium.
So I decided to take advantage of the still quiet that was present in a normally chaotic setting.
I grabbed a book and a notebook, and sat in the middle of the auditorium to do my homework.
But....I couldn't focus on my homework.
Okay, so that's not much of a shocker.
But I still wanted to take advantage of this calm moment.
So I decided to just pray.
I just wanted to have a nice little conversation with my Heavenly Father.
It was very comforting.
But then I started getting distracted again.
This time by the electrical buzzing noise that comes from lights or sound systems.
At first I tried to just ignore it.
That didn't work.
So I thought, "Okay Megan, just get up and turn off the stinking sound system."
And then I thought, "But I'm sooo comfortable."
Seriously...it's not super common to be comfortable sitting in Kirkham auditorium seats.
So obviously I didn't want to move.
But now I couldn't focus on anything but that obnoxious, yet subtle, sound.
I fought it for awhile.
(seeing any parallels with change?)
But then finally, grudgingly, I got up.
I walked onto the stage, and over to the sound system.
Looking forward to that blissful moment of silence, I turned it off.
Nothing happened.
I didn't understand.
I had done what I thought was necessary.
And nothing happened to benefit me.
Sure, the sound system should have been turned off anyway.
But I was still experiencing that blasted electronic buzz.
So I stood there for a minute, trying to decide.
Was I just going to go sit back down?
Or should I search for the source of the buzz?
Okay fine...I was already up.
I'll look around.
I tried a few light switches.
Nothing.
So I looked for some more.....
..........
Found some.
Flipped them.
The sound finally stopped.
Oh blessed day!
Feeling incredibly accomplished (don't judge how easily satisfied I am...), I went and sat back down.
And you know what?
I was even more comfortable than I was before.
Coincidence?
Doubt it.
Did I learn my lesson?
Definitely.
I thought about analyzing it here for you...
But you can interpret it as you will :)
Moral of the story...there are changes coming in my life.
But I have to work to make them happen.
I am terrified.
But I can't wait :)
